Posted by Bruce Pilgrim
Talking to My Cats: 03-04-08
Long story short, my middle name was supposed to honor my uncle Sal and my aunt Tanisha. I'd be more comfortable it if the reasoning behind the name was something along the lines of "A Boy Named Sue" by Johnny Cash -- something to toughen me up a bit. Alas, my parents didn't really give it a whole lot of thought (obviously), and by the time they did, it was already on the birth certificate. So I am Bruce Satan Pilgrim.
Thus, throughout my life, I've had a bit of a PR problem. I've been taunted countless times, endured such sobriquets as Devil Boy, Beelzebubba, Lucy Fur, Satan's Little Helper, and the Prince of Snarkness.
Carrying the baggage of Mephistoles has made it pretty much impossible to pass myself off as angelic. When my mom declaimed my full name in a certain tone of voice, I knew I was in very big trouble. Each year in grade school, the new teacher would take me aside and warn me that they wouldn’t tolerate any of my tricks. Which I always took as a challenge.
As a teenager, I experimented with using initials as an alternative, but B.S. Pilgrim has its own set of problems. Bruce S. Pilgrim didn't really ring, either. In my senior year in high school, I briefly embraced the opposite strategy and unsuccessfully campaigned as "Satan for Student Council." This did not go over very well in an all-boys Catholic institution.
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